SWERVE ‘EM & CURVE ‘EM

I was having a casual convo with my girl, about women and how thirsty they can be on social media. ESPECIALLY when pertaining to men (specifically those who are already spoken for). This is a heated topic for most of us. We don’t like women taking second glances at our man, much less cyber flirting with him. My research has proven that it takes .5 seconds for a woman to get perturbed by the presence of another female, on her man’s social media account. What is the origin of said research, you ask? 

UH…my home girls…

DUH

This is a constant topic of discussion, for us. && it’s a difficult thing for us to ignore because we are so territorial…&& men just don’t seem to get it. They just can not wrap their heads around why we get so instantly indignant, with women who have no relevance…&& what’s worse is now that we’re bothered we have to take our talents down to the “Let’s talk couch” and stress him out with another “I think it’s funny how…Why you always gotta be so friendly?… Maybe if you would stop posting gym selfie’s all the time…” conversation, for the umpteenth time!

stressed

Now he’s sitting there all stressed and pressed because all he wanted to do was come home and partake in some Netflix and Chill…&& now he’s got to explain himself and apologize, for something he didn’t even know occurred. 

EYE ROLL
Yeah, whatever. Stop being so fine and we won’t have these problems.

Women though…these heifer’s have so much audacity. They will make a comment half an inch from crossing the line and then be like “He ain’t thinking about me sis. He love you.” OH, YES MA’AM…You bet your bottom dollar he does and I am completely aware of that fact. What I am currently unaware of is why you think it is acceptable to place a plethora of heart eyed emoji’s under his pic…as if I will not see them. FIRST OFF…I know the man is attractive, boo. That’s one of the many reasons he was cuffed. SECOND, you already knew he was in a relationship. I know this because ALL women have majored in social media private investigating, at some point in their life. If we are interested, we know where he grew up, which high school he graduated from, and his current relationship status in 90 seconds! That’s just how we do.

THIRDLY…how daaaare you…

neck roll.gif

How dare you trespass on the sanctity of our union and then have the nerve to turn your nose up at me…As if, I’m the one who’s out of pocket! How dare you make questionable remarks underneath his pictures/status updates and then refer to me as INSECURE…Babbbaayyyy, let me go ahead and illustrate a picture of what INSECURE actually looks like…for your royal simpleness!

INSECURE IS…

  • A grown woman who enjoys long scrolls down her timeline and attempting to engage in flirtatious banter, with another woman’s man.

INSECURE IS…

  • Trying to shame another woman for being protective over what is rightfully hers…

INSECURE IS…

  • Someone who gives relationship advice but cannot sustain a healthy relationship, to save their own life.

SO JOT THAT DOWN.

One thing that I do understand is that some women who make these girl code infractions, are unaware of what they’re doing. Not many…but some…So…I have created a list of guidelines, on how to tread softly while publicly addressing another woman’s man.

  1.  Avoid all pet names. Honey, baby, sweetie, love, etc. 
  2. Heart emoji’s (and any other flirtatious smileys) should never be placed on his selfies. Reserve those for family pictures or thought provoking quotes.
  3. Less is more. There is a thin line between “Friendly” and “doing too damn much”. Do NOT cross that line.
  4. Stay out of his DM’s!
  5. Chill out with the excessive snap chats. Responses to funny posts are acceptable…once every 3 weeks. 

Just to name a few.

Ladies…be mindful that this post was directed towards women with men that respect them, enough NOT to engage in inappropriate social behaviors with other women. If homeboy is allowing it and you are coming for the female –> YOU LOOK DUMB

Pgy4Na8aRyBuE

MESSAGE TO THE FELLA’S:

Give us a break. Y’all know we crazy. We haven’t changed, nor switched up. Been A1, since day 1. We know we can go a little over board sometimes but it’s for a good cause. Think of it this way…if she never feels territorial than that girl AIN’T YOU GIRL, fam! 

Bloop

It’s back ups in her phone, just in case she decide to lay you off. Also, y’all have to start curving women in the same regard that you want us to curve other men. Y’all know good and well if another ninja hop in bae DM’S with the “You fine as hell” you want her to hit ’em with the…

 

tenor
Or nahhh…

That’s exactly what we need from you. For you to let these females know that it’s not a game and above all else you NEVER disrespect the queen. 

I need some feedback from my ladies and gents. LADIES…Tell me if I’m right or if you disagree. GENTS…Tell me if you’ve had to deal with this from your queen and feel free to share any funny stories or anecdotes.

STAY.GOLDEN.Y’ALL

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s